10 Christmas funnies to make you smile

1. It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,

“What are you charged with?” “Doing my Christmas shopping early”, replied the

defendant. “That’s no offense,” said the judge. “How early were you doing this

shopping?” “Before the shop opened,” came the reply.

2. Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparent’s house. At bedtime,

the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers and the youngest one began

praying at the top of his lungs:

“I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE…

I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE…

I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE…”

His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, “Why are

you shouting your prayers? God isn’t deaf.” To which the little brother replied, “No,

but Gramma is!”

3. Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast? A: Snowflakes.

4. Why is Christmas just like another day at the office? You do all the work and the

fat guy with the suit gets all the credit!

5. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? You have to holow out it’s

head first

6. Why does Father Christmas like to work in the garden? Because he likes to hoe,

hoe, hoe!

7. As a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, “And what would

you like for Christmas?” The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a

minute, then gasped, “Didn’t you get my e-mail?” (by Adam Sandler)

8. What do you call the wrapping paper leftover from opening presents? Achrist-

MESS

9. The four stages of life: 1. You believe in Santa Claus 2. You don’t believe in Santa

Claus 3. You dress up as Santa Claus 4. You look like Santa Claus.

10. What do you call an elf who sings? A wrapper!

Sources: www.coolest-holiday-parties.com, www.rd.com,

www.jokes4us.com