IN a recent discussion relating to public complaints about ladies of the night making a nuisance of themselves on city street corners, it was mentioned that they are no longer to be referred to as prostitutes. The new job title, apparently, is ‘Pleasure Consultants’.
Ja well, no fine. The term consultant does give their job description a ring of professional upliftment, so to speak, as opposed to the earlier attempt at replacing the more crass prostitute with sex worker. This latter doesn’t rate highly in the status stakes at all.
One can imagine that clients prefer this as well. Paying for the services of a consultant simply promises far more stimulating results compared to letting a mere worker loose on one’s assets.
Which brings us to the poor pimp. Compared to consultant, the term pimp sounds inferior and in desperate need of a job description upgrade as well.
The pimp is, after all, the boss and should perhaps be called something more becoming, like a Climactic Facilitating Executive. That suggests someone seriously important.
Everywhere, be it in government or the private sector, is the tendency followed of drawing up image enhancing organograms – or rather orgasmograms, given the ridiculous attempts of aggrandizement.
Instead of an easy to understand title like Manager of Sewage Works, such a person can now stand around the braai fire informing his mates he is now a Managing Executive: Maceration and Malodorous Effluent Transportation Operations. That is, like, heavyweight stuff, dude!
The lowly street sweeper, in these times of equality above all, should also not be excluded from the ego-boosting title adjustment exercises.
Nothing less than Woody Perennial (aka trees) Discard Matter and Rejected Plastic and Paper Product Assembly and Translocation Operations Manager will do.
And so we can go on…
Humanism gone wrong
This superficial pursuit of status and achievement recognition has also permeated to other sectors – even getting a foothold in schools.
Our humanist sensitivities has gradually pushed us to the point of bringing homage to everyone, lest their omission from the scrolls of honour result in them feeling rejected and developing serious psychological scars which they will carry into adulthood and enrich the couch counsellors.
After all the proper academic and sport allocates, we now find awards for significant things like ‘Most Persistent Academic Scholar’ for the pupil who steadfastly soldiers on after failing Grade 6 for the seventh time. That will no doubt inspire young Billy to achieve his dream of become a nuclear physicist.
This is in line with the modern-day balderdash of ‘Yes You Can’ type motivational speakers who coin it big time at seminars selling the fantasy that we can become or achieve anything we wish if we visualise and believe it.
But perhaps I’m too judgmental. Won’t I be showed up if all my visualisation, belief, chakra manipulation or feng-shui correctness cause some astral mind travelling particles to reach Charlize Theron – and she does call me for personal counselling sessions in the bush to help her overcome her divorce sorrows.
In the meantime, tempus fugit.
