Coming out an educational exercise

LAST year Rachel Dreyer of Empangeni shared the very personal account of her transition from male to female, and educated our readers on transgender issues in an article titled ‘Born in the wrong body’.

We spoke to her on the after-affects of the article, and the public reaction to her story.

What was the reaction from those closest to you when we published the ‘My Story’ article?

My family did not know about it as they do not live in KZN.

I did send them the link to the online story. I had only recently come out to them, and not much was said about it.

My close friends were shocked that I could be so open about my life and past. They said I was a very brave and an inspirational thing to do. They loved the story.

The reactions of my colleagues were somewhat mixed – some reacted badly, while others were fully supportive and came and spoke to me about it.

They were shocked and said they could not believe what I had been through, and spoke about how they had learned a lot from the article.

They now see transgender people in a different way.

ALSO READ: MY STORY: ‘I knew I was born in the wrong body’

What made you reach out?

I reached out in an attempt to help others like me, and to educate the public on what a transgendered person is as there are so many misconceptions, stigmas, false depictions on television, in the movies and on the internet.

Many of these give transgendered people a bad name and I wanted to set the record straight.

If I had read an article like that in the paper, I would have seen that there is hope for people like me and that it is acceptable to be who you really are.

I would have known that I didn’t have to feel alone, feel pain or have suicidal thoughts.

How did you feel telling the initial story?

To be honest it took me quite a while to find the words.

During the most emotional parts I had to stop quite a few times as I could no longer see from all the tears.

It was hard looking back into the past as it brought back all the emotions with it.

It was certainly one of the most difficult and emotional things I have ever had to write.

What effect has the article had on your life?

A profound effect. My friends and family have a better idea of what I have had to deal with in my past and my reason for transition.

In fact, most people have changed from being completely unsupportive and negative towards me, to becoming my friends.

I have had complete strangers walk up to me in public places, introduce themselves, and tell me that they read the article.

When I went out in public in the beginning of my transition, I was stared at, made fun of, laughed at. People were just so cruel.

After the article was published I started to see a difference – no more laughing or comments, just a knowing smile and a nod of the head.

At this point I knew the article had done what it was supposed to do. Talk to me. Ask questions about things you don’t understand.

Have others in our community benefitted from your story?

I think many people benefitted from an educational and informative perspective.

I have had many people reach out to me with regards to more information as they have a friend or a family member that is transgender and they don’t know what to do or how to handle the situation.

I have also had a few transgender people ask for advice on how to start their transition as they read my story, identified with it and found many similarities.

I am thankful to the Zululand Observer for publishing my story as it has had a massive positive impact on my life.

My goal was to educate people and help others like me, and I have been successful in doing that.

What is the next step on your journey?

I still have a long road ahead of me. I’m still finding myself.

Our awareness campaign and support group is doing very well and we are helping the community where we can.

My focus will be on this in the future.

All I want is to be happy with my body and my life and, hopefully, find love.

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